ok monday take two...

The kids are in bed. I have taken that deep breath and Im ready to repost my monday. Most of today SUCKED... Im not going to go back into that... you are read all about it HERE.

Ok now what?

First I am feeling alittle overwelmed about going back to work. I have been at my sister hospital for 3 months before I went out on maternity leave. Im going back to my main hospital. I wont be the intensivist any more but instead will have to work with (under) a doc. It will be different. Not to mention there are several new docs I havent met yet since I left. I worry I will seem stupid or forget something. I worry that I wont be able to fit in everything in life once Im back.  I need to take another deep breath and realize 1. Im good at what I do, I love my job and care about my patients. The nurses and docs love me. And Im never done learning. and 2. sometimes not everything will fit in. Just do your best. When I went back to work after Gavin I also started graduate school... has to be easier than that!

Second I was worried about getting my workouts in this week. I made a plan -
Tuesday - 3 mile run, upper body weights at gym
Wed - 30 min elliptical and core will attempt before work but if not then after
Thur - 530am spin class before work
Fri - 3 mile run, upper body weights at gym before meeting at work
Sat - spin class in am
Sun - step class in am

I just need to get through these days then hubby goes back to dayshift for 2 weeks and life is 5 million times better.

I need to plan out my food and pack it the night before. I plan to pack lunch, dinner and snacks. I have a cool new water bottle and some flavor things for it to keep at work.

I wonder if some of the funk of today was me thinking of my birthday coming up. I have no clue how I cant get it in my head that I just had a baby... Im not supposed to be where I was at my fittest yet. Its ok. And while I KNOW that... my brain keeps ignoring it. I feel like I should be further. I know I know.   Oh and I havent heard back from the go mama go people yet.

I need to go to bed.