Yes the last few weeks (months) I have been falling deeper and deeper into a big black hole of self pity and depression. It has NOT been pretty and Im sure you all are sick of hearing me whine over and over about how horrible Im doing lately.
Well no one is going to throw me a life raft...if I am going to crawl out of this hole then I need to start reaching to get out on my own, you know?
First - at 930 tomorrow morning I WILL be at a weight watchers meeting. I havent been in weeks and even longer since I have actually stayed for the meeting. Tomorrow, althought the weigh in will be HORRIBLE and I will get THAT look from the WW person... I will go with a smile and stay.
Second - I went on my insurance website and printed out the info for all of the therapist covered in my area. Tomorrow Im going to make some phone calls and see if I can find one that fits and try to work through my issues.
Third - I was getting VERY discouraged about this marathon thing. I am WAY behind on my marathon training. I should be on 16 or 17 miles right now but I have only done double digit runs twice since November! Training for the half marathon was sooooo much easier. It was during the spring/summer for training - much better weather. Nicole, my running partner, and I got together almost once a week and wow what a difference that made. We pushed each other and made it so much more fun. I havent seen Nicole since November :( Our schedules just havent jived together. The weather and the holidays definately havent helped. Today I reached out to her and told her my concerns and that part of me is seriously thinking about cutting back to the half marathon. Im so glad I did. She made me feel so much better. She was positive and had a plan. We will get there. So tomorrow after my WW meeting I will be at the gym to run 15 miles or as a viewer mentioned only 3 5-milers! I was hoping to do it outside and had a route set up and everything but the snow just hasnt been cleaned safely enough from the sides of the road... I would be too close to traffic. Not safe. So treadmill here I come.
So I have a plan... I have a rope and Im reaching for it with all my might to get out of this hole.