Sunday, May 30, 2010

Yesterday I went to spin class and realized that I officialy have stuck with it. Its been a few months and I still love the spin classes and try to get 2-3 in each week. SOOOOO I decided I deserved a alittle gift to keep me pushed and going ... I went to the bike store and treated myself to clip in bike shoes! They were alittle pricey but I deserve it! I will post pics of my adorable perfect shoes later today. Im heading back for another spin class today and will try out the shoes. I worry that they have the right clips and I will be able to clip in and out without needing help but everyone had to start somewhere right?

Eating went well yesterday
egg whites on a muffin
sauted chicken, brown rice and mushrooms
baked chicken brown rice brocoli and corn on the cob
an orange
some baked cheetos

THEN - after movie night I gave into an english muffin with a bit of peanut butter and banana. YUMMY! I should have been done and then no harm really done - but then after I couldnt stop. I had a package of fruit snacks and then some cookies. uhhhh... but I journaled everything and took it out of my weekly points.

Today I am up - about to get dressed for the gym. Afterwards need to get the dog to the groomers cause she stinks! THen some errands with hubby. Going swimming with the little man and then a cookout at my moms. Im bringing some turkey keilbasa to put on the grill and veggies.

Friday, May 28, 2010

back.... yet again...

I dont know what goes through my mind but when I get off track I REALLY get off track. Yes I ran while I was gone but I ate and ate and ate some more. I ate with meals, I ate in between meals, I ate after everyone went to bed. It wasnt even all that great. I have gotten compltely off track with the limited dairy intake.... and my stomach notices it.

I gained a pound or two - Im 172 as of this morning. I will updated the weekly weigh in page later promise so you can see the up down up down. If I would have stayed on track I would easily be low 160s right now and feeling amazing instead of such a blah failure!

So yesterday my wonderful husband went grocery shopping and rebought most of my healthy yummy food ... I need to go and get a few things but for the most part Im good. I packed my lunch today. Stayed within daily points. I have decided to start my weekly points on fridays so that I could completely recalculate things today. I just signed up for the sat am spin class. Time to get back on track.

I am SO SO SO scared of maintenence... I feel like I will be a yoyo dieter forever.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010


We are spending a few days with my SIL, BIL and my amazing nieces - I have missed them all.

1. They 100% totally noticed the weight loss and have praised me and asked alot of questions as to how I did it and that makes me SOOOOO happy!

2. I havent eaten fabulous but havent eaten horribly either.

3. Ran 2 miles yesterday 2.5 today. Aiming for 3 tomarrow.


Sunday, May 23, 2010

No massage for me

and I suck fyi.

The week started off really good - worked out like a crazy person. Then I worked 5 days straight, didnt work out at ALL and ordered out and ate CRAP. Got a new battery for my scale and Im up another 1.5 lbs.

I think Im making myself fail with crazy structured weekly goals.

This weeks goal - be healthy. Eat on the right track, move alot and do my best.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

day 3 and 4

Day 3 went very well. I kicked butt at the gym - a step class, some core work and 30 min run on the tread mill. Did good in the eating department too. Worked for 6 hours that felt like 20... I was SOOOOO tired when I got home.

Today is day 4 - Im on a day 2 of 5 stretch for work so I may not be very bloggy - I packed my lunch and an afternoon snack to get me home. I just had an egg white sandwich on my favortie new flax and seed bread - so so so yummy. Time to get ready for work.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

day two - take two...

Ok lets retry todays post - it was alittle pitiful. Yes, I planned well. Yes it didnt go as I planned. Yes I gave in and felt horrible about it BUT I didnt let it take over the rest of my day. I didnt give in and sit on my ass and watch tv and eat more junk to make me feel worse.

I went into the bedroom and got my workout gear on and I hit the treadmill. I got in a solid hard sweaty 45 min run in... even though my stomach feels blah - Im gassy (tmi I know) but I pushed through and Im proud of myself.

Let me back up a second though - I need new workout gear! My pants were practically falling off as I ran and a t-shirt that fit me nicely last summer is hanging on me - massively baggy on my arms, around my neck and entire body. It is amazing but I dont feel cute AT ALL in baggy clothes so I think I need a workout shopping trip - even if its just to walmart or target.

So I want an evening snack - Im thinking a handful of rasberries and half a banana. yummy!

So tomarrow is a new day and Im going into it a much better happier more centered person. Going to hit the gym in the am. See my hubby for a few short hours and then get 8 hours of work in.

I love me and I am worth it. I need to start being nicer to me... I love me and I deserve to show my self love, respect and understanding. Dont forget this!

day two started ok.... then not so much.

I started day two off STRONG. Food was planned and great. Planned to get a great run in tonight. Then I very easily got talked into going out to dinner. Mexican. Cheese, greasy meat, fried tortilla chips. NOT good. Expecially when I planned a huge salad with chicken and rice.

Now my stomach is KILLING me. I still need to get the run in but blah I dont wanna and technically I failed my challange less than 48 hours after starting it.

Well you know what? Im giving myself a one time pass and this evening was it. As long as I stay true to the challange and grow a bit of a decision making back bone for the rest of the week ... I still deserve the darn massage!

SO Im letting my stomach settle then heading to watch biggest loser on the tread mill.

Tomarrow is a new day!

Monday, May 17, 2010

challange day 1...

So far day one has gone really really well...

I had an amazing workout this morning. Spin class rocked. There was one point where we had two big surges left - really hard - rpm of 100 with a gear of 14-15... tough! The instructor said to imagine two people that you want to pass and really give it to them. My first person I wanted to pass was me. I stand in my way ALL of the time. So I put my head down and pumped it out and passed right by myself. The second surge I passed my weight challange. It was very very motivating! I followed that with an upper body workout.

My food has been right on today. Im a bit stuffed right now from dinner so around 8ish Im going to get a light jog in. I have 3 points left for an evening snack.

Food journal -
745am 1 egg white/1 whole egg on an english muffin
1030am pretzel with hummus
130pm turkey on a sandwich thin, carrots and hummus
3pm strawberries
4pm cantalope
630 salad with light italian dressing, roasted chicken, green beans, brown rice with onions/mushrooms/zuchini.


Hope tomarrow is just as good! I needed this push.

challange time...

I have issued a challange to myself. I have put down the challange and I have accepted the challange. The reward for said challange - a 1 hour massage.. I want it!

I have sucked lately. I havent journaled in 2-3 days - I never do well when I dont journal. I have binged for 2 days - I have felt horrible! My skin isnt happy, my body/muscles arent happy, my mood definately isnt happy.

So here comes the challange - most I was doing before this horrible week! Oh and FYI I gained 1 lb this week.

1. NO extra points - stay within 27 points daily. Plan better, no extra points!

2. Minimal dairy.

3. No refined sugar - I have thrown out the junk I have been binging on already.

4. 9 workouts this week - I love my mornings at the gym but miss running so I am going to try to do both.

5. NO eating after 9pm.

6. WATER WATER WATER - get your ounces back up

OK 6 things - yes some of them are alittle difficult. ONE week... I can do anything for one week and most of the week I will be at work so the eating part will be easy - working out will be difficult but if I do the below schedule I can get them in.
Workout #1 and 2 - monday morning spinning followed by weights
WOrkout #3 - jogging monday afternoon
WOrkout #4 - jogging tuesday morning
WOrkout #5 - spinning expressions wed morning
Workout #6 - spinning thur morning before work
WOrkout #7 - weights friday morning
WOrkout #8 - jogging/elliptical sat morning
WOrkout #9 - Jogging/elliptical sun morning

Yes thats alot but I can do this!

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Eating like a pregnant fat cow...

Yup thats me - I have eaten and eaten and eaten. Didnt go to the gym today. FEEL BLAHHHHHH! It was gorgeous outside today and I have wanted to do NOTHING. I have jsut felt so blah ...

The question is does the blah feeling make me eat or by eating poorly do I feel BLAH??? I think its a mixture of both. I need to get back on track. I need to get back on the no refined sugar and minimal dairy. I felt so much better with that.

Tomarrow is a new day. I need to get back on track and bust through this feeling. I can do this!

Saturday, May 15, 2010

amazing how fast they fall...

Three days ago I was bragging about how great I felt. Today NOT so much!

IT has been 2 day of eating like crap. Eating alot of dairy and a ton of refined sugar... and my body feels disgusting - the 5 beers didnt help either!. Not to mention I hurt my knee in extreme step this morning and had to leave 15 min early.

I need to get back on gear - Im sure I gained this week. WHY DO I DO THIS???

Thursday, May 13, 2010

awesome spin/sickingly happy/no meds

I had an AMAZING spin workout today! I didnt want to go. I was tired and blah but Im so glad I did. My favorite instructor tought the class. She is such an amazing ball of energy. You can tell she LOVES what she does and really wants you to love it too. She pushes me to push faster, keep a higher gear and never give up. Not to mention she has the body I want.... does that sound weird? I dont care.

Once I get to the 150s I think Im going to readd some personal training sessions 2 times a week as my gift to myself for hitting the 150s. I need to book the massage for getting into the 160s still - although Im thinking of getting some spin bike shoes instead :) I love spinning!

I think Im going to take a quick nap now that G is down. Then I promised E I would clean out the fridge... fun fun. Then if it stays no rain we will head outside for some family play time, maybe take a bike ride, cook dinner on the grill. I love these kind of days.

I need to end the day doing some work related stuff - but I like that too :)

Sorry Im so sickingly happy... I hope this keeps up...

I stopped taking my antidepressant 2 weeks ago. Im alittle nervous about it but I HATE taking pills and I HATE relying on meds to make me feel better. Granted I loved the side effects of wellbutrin - expecially the hunger suppressant but I dont think I need it. I think my lifestyle is helping the neurotransmitters and I dont need to rely on pills. Granted I have warned my hubby and closest friends to be on the lookout and let me know if they think Im slipping back.

hi everyone...

I dont have a ton to post about these days - I have been really busy. Not to mention Im doing good and Im happy and I tend to blog way less when Im happy. Weird but true.

For the most part Im doing the no dairy, no refined sugar with bites of things here and there. I have been pretty good on the no dairy part though. Yesterday at work someone make a starbucks run... not good. I ordered my usual skinny latte without thinking about it - I should have ordered soy. WOW almost immediately after drinking it I was so gassy and bloated. WOW what a difference the dairy made... my stomach did not feel good.

I am officially in the 160s - today I was 168.5... yaaaa me! Which means my next big slip up wont be until right before I head into the 150s... I have no clue why I freak out every time Im about to hit another section. But I have done it every single time.

Work is going good. Everyone is so incredibly nice - I LOVE IT there! I have so so so much to learn but Im looking forward to learning it all. Im excited about work. I love going. What a relief, I was really worried about it. I do need to get my arms stronger though - I was intubating someone yesterday and holding the blade and handle and my arm was shaking trying to keep their tongue out of the way. I havent missed a line yet either! Yesterday I did my first throacentesis as an NP. woohoo! Its still super weird introducing myself as the NP but I love it!

Today Im off to spin class - third spin class this week. They are addictive! I wanted to go to a spin class this past tuesday but got confused and thought it was wed and when I got there the class I thought I was going to wasnt there since it was the wrong day so I did a spin class... glad I did. It was a different instructor and was probually my best spin class to date. SO back today. Tomarrow I will have an off day exercise wise but will work and them Im off work for 4 days ... woohoo!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010


Minus my dog just puking all over my carpet - hense the EWWW - today has been a pretty good day. Got up and headed to the gym for another spin class followed by an upper body workout and a bit of abs... I need to start enjoying abs a bit more, I suck at them! Then we were off to watch G play alittle soccer after preschool. Lunch at panera. I was NOT a fan of the new salmon salad - granted I had mine with no cheese and no dressing but not a fan. Its raining out and cold - yuck, about to curl up for a family nap. Then off to get a pedicure with Rach and do alittle straightening up and alittle work stuff.

DOnt feel fat today - weird how those days come and go and have no reason to what causes them.

Monday, May 10, 2010

Having a fat morning

Im having a BIG morning - I feel fat. My clothes feel funny. My thighs look big. I did not enjoy a second of the spin class... I did it but was not feeling it the entire time.

I know Im smaller. I know Im doing exactly what I need to be doing but just having one of those days.

Ok off to play with my little man on the trampoline then going to take a nap and hope to wake up in a better mood.

weigh in

Officially down 2 lbs this week - I am actually alittle shocked and dissappointed at the same time. This is the first full week of supposibly no refined sugar, no dairy. I was doing AWESOME then I started my period and everything went down hill. The last two days I have eaten icecream, candy, junk. Alot of it too... so I probually would have lost closer to 3 or 4 due to the origional changes I made... but regardless I lost 2 lbs and my bad habits the last two days didnt make me gain! WOOHOO!!!

About to make some oatmeal and then head to spin class.

Saturday, May 8, 2010

busy busy

Ive been busy busy with the new job and getting my family time in. It has been a great week. I LOVE my new job! I have a ways to go - but I have a great feeling it will happen. I feel like Im in the right place. I LOVE the people. Everyone has been very welcoming and so helpful!

Have I mentioned that Im loving this dairy free thing... I wish I would have tried it way sooner!

Will post more - promise!

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

ok what I have been eating...

I am loving eating this way. I feel so so so much better!

So what have I been eating?

Breakfast - Not much have changed with breakfast except no cheese on my eggs.
1. Three egg whites on a plain english muffin
2. Egg white omelet with mushrooms and diced tomatoe.
3. low sugar oatmeal
4. fruit
5. coffee with almond breeze or a soy latte.

Lunch - Mainly my lunches have either consisted of a very large salad with a mix of romaine, radicio (sp?), spring mix and some fresh herbs like cilantro or basil. Then tomatoe, cucumber (I have been buying those small seedless ones and eating the whole thing), sometimes red pepper strips, sometimes black beans. I add some form of protein - either 3 oz turkey, chicken or tuna and then sprayed with olive oil and red wine vinegar. YUMMY! Or I have a black bean burger with some veggie cheese on it.

Dinner - protein and veggies. I have been grilling salmon, shrimp, chicken, chicken and more chicken. Tonight Im having steak. Then what ever veggies I can get ahold of - mainly asparagus, fresh green beans, brocoli.

Snacks -
1. Redpepper strips dipped in hummus
2. Carrots dipped in hummus
3. pretzels dipped in hummus - can you tell I like hummus?
4. plain almonds
5. triscuits
6. every type of fruit
7. my fake cobbler - 1/4 cup self rising flour, 1/4 cup almond breeze, 2 splenda mixed together, sprayed with spray butter, put that in a small baking dish. Put a handful of raspberries on top, sprinkle with 1 splenda and bake at 350 until brownned. It does the trick.


Sorry I have been MIA - new job starting was busy and Im not feeling so hot yesterday and today.

I put in a central line solo yesterday - it was awesome! granted I completely froze going to my first rapid responce by myself though and had to call for back up... I will get there in time Im sure. Its hard being on the other side of things.

I have a massive earache - like put me to bed early in tears earache. It is better today but my hearing feels funny, debating heading to patient first but really dont want to.

Diet is going very well. Later today when I have some down time I will post what I have been eating. I need to get to the store today too... I love the unprocessed fresh food I have been eating. I havent been hungry or craving anything and feel great. Todays weight - yes Im weighing myself daily, no I dont care what you think - was 169.5... my first weight in the 160s. Im so so so excited!

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

new job

Not much time to write but I LOVE MY NEW JOB!!!! Yes I have alot to learn and grow but thats all part of it. I LOVE the people and the hospital. Hopefully everything will fall into place. Introducing myself as an NP is WEIRD!

No refined sugars/no dairy is going VERY well.

Monday, May 3, 2010


Its monday. The same monday that I start my new job! I cannot believe I actually slept last night. I cant believe Im not 100% freaking out... Im only about 90% freaking out! hehe

This mornings weigh in 171.5 - down 2.5 lbs this week but still up 0.5 lbs from 2 weeks ago... I think I will see the 160s next week!

Its 5am - Im up, drinking my coffee and about to get my workout in then ready for work and out the door.

I hope today goes well. I hope today goes well. I hope today goes well!

Sunday, May 2, 2010

a great day so far...

So far no sugar no dairy is going very well... granted its only noon but still. Todays food so far has included
1. One egg, one egg white on english muffin
2. pear
3. Black bean burger on a sandwich thin with veggie cheese, tomatoe, lettuce, cilantro.
4. carrots with hummus

I have 18 points left for the day. Im a bit worried about snacks but it will go ok.

Spin class was AWESOME today! I sweated my butt off and really pushed myself - more than I ever have before.

The last part of the contest requires a new pic of me so here is today - hoping to get all of the contest stuff emailed off this evening.

Day one no sugar no dairy...

Today is day one and so far so good. I put almond breeze in my coffee... wow so much better than the 1/2 and 1/2 - its nutty and so good for actually way less calories! No cheese on my egg sandwich this morning.

I went shopping yesterday and my fridge looks so yummy - so many beautiful colors of fruits and veggies in my fridge. Today I will be doing alot of prep for the week.

So as I get things ready for the challange I have to come up with 25 reasons for wanting to get healthy and lose weight.

1. I want to be a good example to my son.
2. I want to have tons of energy.
3. I want to stay away from the type2 diabetes that has attached to my family.
4. I want to go shopping and be able to go into any store.
5. I want to not constantly think about how my body looks.
6. I want to constantly not think about food.
7. I want food to turn into fuel not emotions.
8. I want to run a half marathon.
9. I want my husband to want to show me off.
10. I want to look good in a bathing suit this summer.
11. I want to have my self esteem sky rocket!
12. I want to weigh less than my husband - almost there!
13. I want to feel amazing.
14. I dont want to be the fat friend anymore.
15. I want to stop being nervous about meeting new people.
16. I want to be an inspiration to others.
17. I want to never have to look back and keep moving forward.
18. I want to learn to rock climb.
19. I want to have less body freakness and more of a sex drive :)
20. I want to want to be outside running around playing.
21. I want to feel strong.
22. I want to feel in control.
23. I want to look good in a tank top.
24. I want to wear more skirts.
25. I want to be the person I know I was meant to be.

WOW that was hard! I am going to finish my coffee and get ready to head to the gym for spin class.

Saturday, May 1, 2010

I cannot believe Im going to do this...

Another of the wonderful blogs I follow ...

She has been a big inspiration for me and she posted that she is doing a challange. I have been looking for something to get me remotivated and I think this might be it..

Most of the time althought Im staying within my points I feel like Im eating a ton of JUNK. Alot of processed foods, a ton of refined sugars and grains. I dont feel like Im eatting healthier, just less.

This 8 week challange requires that I lose three types of foods from my diet
1. ALL refined sugars
2. ALL dairy products
3. Alcohol - if not completly then dropped by 50%

I want to lose the refined sugars anyways - this would completly 100% help in my diet and make myself feel so much better... it is also going to be very very hard.

I have never wanted to lose dairy before. I have never thought I had an issue with dairy before. I like yogurt, cheese, sourcream. I like cream in my coffee. I love pizza. On her video she discussed the reason you should drop dairy is because it bloats you... thats not enough of a reason for me to completely drop dairy. But I did look into it further and there are alot of medical reasons to drop dairy. It is very slow to digest. It causes a TON of mucus throughout our body and in our organs...ewwww. It adds to fatigue, acne, UTI's. SO while I dont plan to drop dairy forever - Im curious if I notice a change in my body by dropping it so Im going to give it a try for the contest then may add a bit back here and there. The alcohol isnt a big deal for me.

You also need to add something to your diet daily
1. One LARGE salad with minimally cucumber and tomatoe with olive oil and vinager every single day.

I may get 100% sick of salads but we are going in the right season for this and I need to get more in the habit of eating salads so why not.

In addition you have to do 45 min of activity with 2 days having weights - right up my alley. and one minute daily of belly breathing... weird but ok.

You have to make a vision board or list 25 reasons on why you want to get healthier and lose weight. I will do the 25 reasons... I will work on them tonight after G is in bed.

You have to submit a before pic and measurements - I will do that today too.

The deadline is May 3rd... anyone up for trying this with me. Im hoping I can make it the entire 8 weeks but regardless I think this will definately help me get back on track in a good and healthier way.